Moving Prep!

Almost a month since my last post after a lot of rapid fire posts off the bat! I am still here and this is still happening! And this is an excellent example of why I am writing this blog, because it helps to keep me accountable. 

The reduction of my animals continues to be painful, a new agonizing blow was dealt with the discovery that California Kingsnakes are banned across the EU because they are invasive in the Canary Islands… My first and oldest snakes are Cali Kings, at 19 and 20 years old. Not being able to keep them through the end of their lives is devastating. They could live another 5-10 years still and I can’t wait around here that long… They will be going to a good friend of mine to live out their retirement in peace. So, the animals that I am still planning to move with dwindles now to two cats, two geckos, four snakes.

Outside of the soul ripping process of rehoming animals, I have been hyper focusing on getting all my stuff ready to sell- which means going room by room and deciding what to keep and what to let go, with a strong preference for letting it all go. Remember, my goal is to leave here only with what will fit in my 10ft box trailer and no more. That means that the vast majority of what I own needs to get sold! So, getting all that organized and presentable so that people can walk through and buy stuff has been a massive undertaking… BUT, it is finally done and the open house/garage sale is scheduled for this weekend! Then, my house goes on the market at the beginning of next week. Hopefully it sells quick and I can get the fuck out! Well…. To Washington first, it will be a bit longer before I get to the overseas part. 

It’s such a weird feeling because I am so ready to leave and a part of me is already gone, but I am still stuck here a little bit longer and I need to keep working on the things that need to happen in order to actually leave.  

There’s also this annoying issue of hormones… I am approaching my period and starting to feel the irritation and malaise that often comes with it… but also the anxiety and depression spirals that lead to existential dread and so much more, they are all coming back too. I have a pretty solid grasp on how my period affects my hormones and how those hormones affect my emotions but understanding the cycle doesn’t necessarily make it any easier to go through it. And in this case, I am worried about the loss of focus and motivation that results during these cycles. I feel like I wrote about this recently, did I mention this in an earlier blog? Maybe I talked about it in my therapy group… See? Anxiety induced memory loss fucking sucks lol
Anyways, with this emotional turmoil every month it feels like I am basically needing to restart on anything I am doing after the end of each period. It is SO annoying… but also so hard to retain focus and motivation through the hormones -.- 

This wasn’t so much of a problem prior to the burnout and chronic stress I have been feeling for the past years so I don’t think it is JUST the period that causes this but is actually the effects of long term stress and how that just kind of exacerbates everything… Seriously, I can only hope that this will all improve as I work towards improving my life- and maybe can get into actual therapy again. 

The other big thing I am doing now is working towards setting myself up as a freelance website designer, primarily using Squarespace. I have started fixing up my Upwork profile and will be looking into some other freelancer type sites as well. In doing so, I realized that there was an “about the author” section included on my blog HERE that I didn’t even know about! I guess no one felt the need to tell me that the “about the author” blurb was not about me! Well that is fixed now. I also realized a few things on a previous client’s site were broken so I am going to fix those as well while I am getting screenshots for my portfolio. Then the big thing that needs to happen is… I need to get clients! Know anyone needing a website? Hit me up!